"Lemon and Orange" Batik look in watercolors and more about me"
Is lemon season at least on my head, is been long since i haven't done a blog post, it was due time, wanting to do a video for the process of each paintings coming soon. Some people might think that we just paint for the hek of it, but reality is that goes beyond that, Have you heard the expression, When life gives you lemons...make lemonade.? " is a very common one, yet, is better said than done.
This is what that is, I'm making lemonade with everything life has thrown my way, i have to learn to say no, to advocate and to be my own counsel and my own pro me, to be careful not everyone has the best intentions and when they might give something they might ask you in return, from those i have learned to stay far away. Anyone that tries to manipulate in this way is despicable, period. I have met so many great people as well as many, many bad people, learned a lot about peoples roles in their jobs and have a keen sense when they don't like it, or not wanting to help, and what not to say or what to say, that there's always a solution to our problems and yes that urgent so called thing can wait, learned that those curves are beautiful every inch of them if you where wondering I am an average size 12. to love my self, had to reload all this in my head. To be able to survive with my three children.
I have become tenacious in the things i can acquire and also learned to let go when is out of my control, had to stop for a while and think, if i keep running? where do i actually go? Can't run from problems, but each one of them tackle in it's own time. Can't also take in, every single opinion from others, or you will go completely nuts, Yes, there's always suggestions, but you have to make the final decision, learned that if it sounds right in my guts, i must go for it. To let go of doubts, to understand every time i look in the mirror, there's an amazing women, yes, a great artist, a mom, a beautiful intelligent person staring right back at me, that all this will come to pass soon. and that God will grant me the well deserved peace i want, i know the journey or rough puzzle is not over, but i am able to completed.
If i look back in life, i will described my self as a low self esteem individual, with out the ability to express her self, completely under the control of another individual that was creating chaos in he's own life, full of lies and deceit. Oblivious to what was happening and in real danger! At this point i can speak out loud and i have no issues or problems with whom reads it, because is my past, and i have learned to overcome and to be free from all this. I knew i waited too long, i was afraid about what others might think, i was afraid about people next to me, i was so concerned about each and everyone's opinion, i often beat myself up because i thought i wasn't good enough, smart enough,creative enough, not able to do absolutely anything with out someone next to me telling me what and how, i was used and abused,victimized, terrorized, because people know this things and can see when someone is easily managed, people with abusive and control issues can see that. Also we have to be careful because we can become the same ourselves if we don't seek help. It is in our best interest to flee from that and to regain our own freedom.
Yes, painting is more than just a subject, than just a still life, is a subconscious thing, an inside matter, an letter to ourselves saying at least in my case, it will get better, beautified by a grandiose sense of I can and create. The best therapy that one can have, my outlet to what surrounds me, the freedom of expression and what makes me a better person..
My goals for the upcoming years, are many, i think have been able to accomplish more in this year than in the past 10 years, i am back on twitter @Vargasartstudio, both of my stores ebay and etsy are back, i am also taking several courses, i have read several books, i have powerful tools to become better.
If you are interested in this or any other paintings, you can contact me trough email for more details: firstname.lastname@example.org
Abuse is abuse and not necessarily needs to be Physical learn the facts. And feller''s treat your ladies right, however it can go both ways. A lot of women including myself stay in this situation because well let's face it "love" we love and think is okay also can be because a man can do much more physically and economy, but this puts ourselves in even greater danger, like i said there's no need to go trough it, also for those whom know whom they are...talking about you!!!!, who likes to push others peoples buttons there's a tone of resources out there for you too!! but you need to want to be a better person!! stop the excuse tho', no one deserves to be treated like dirt, because you have had past issues. :) There's help for both the victims and the other peoples..lol
Books might be worth reading or have read recently Thrive by Arianna Huffington and also the Body Book by Camerom Diaz with Sandra Bark
If you or someone you know, is a Domestic Violence victim please contact: 1-800-799-7233
follow @NNEDV on twitter resources and empowerment for domestic violence victims nnedv.org/
Women we are beautiful, no matter the size, no matter what you gone trough in life, love yourself this is an important rule when you do, everything else falls in to place.